In the Rose Garden / Haiku for the Win!

KillerxXxQueen · Back to Top

A place for random haiku, the ultimate form of poetry. I'll begin with what I wrote in the general nothingness of today. Post your own or leave your comments on everyone's sure-to-be-lovely haikus [how in the name of corn do you pluralize that?]

Kennedy got shot
On a clear day in Dallas
Oswald died better

London Bridge falls down
I hope it crushes someone
That would be awesome

Puppies are furry
Kittens are covered in fluff
Snakes are just awful

Welcome to our town
A drug-free environment
All the drugs are free

Learn to free your mind
You're just another player
On the stage of life

No joke is greater:
Individualism
We're all just robots.

I hate poetry
There is no goddamn point
Stupid Dickenson

Soukougnan · Back to Top

i do write haiku
perhaps i should say haikus?
i don't know for sure

ohtori crazy
what color would be my rose?
quixotic or mad?

connect to the webs
what is this? 4chan?
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, IT BURNS!!!

she sleeps, my sweet one
her light breaths fill me with joy
'cept when they're not sweet

OH. hey, my guy just reminded me of one he thinks is funny, so i'm going to attempt to re-create it, since i don't know it by heart.

haikus are pretty
except they don't make much sense
something 'bout hot dogs

PrinceoftheLostEternity · Back to Top

Behold Godzilla
Mimi runs in terror
It's simply a drill

Enter the Matrix
The smell of fish is profound
Close your goddamned legs

Sometimes sex is good
Unless you fuck everything
Then you're the Chairman

Apartheid is bad
Sometimes it's okay, though
In moderation

I was on the stool
Emily turned and asked me
"Hey, did you fart, too?"

School is almost out
Next week is graduation
I fucking hate this

My back always hurts
The pain is unbearable
God, please kill me now

Last edited by PrinceoftheLostEternity (05-18-2009 08:14:29 AM)

satyreyes · Back to Top

Prince, on IRG,
We can totally talk race,
But not in haiku.

There's not enough space
To be thoughtful and reasoned
And not just racist.

Nilamarthiel · Back to Top

I am not sure if
You know this, but I really
Hate the holidays.

satyreyes · Back to Top

Okay, dropping the haiku here as the mod hat goes on. Not being a racist does not make it okay to say racist things. Pointing out stereotypes is different from embracing them, as you did in your original haiku. You are not being ironic, you're not being clever or subversive, you're being a jerk. Keep it up and you'll get banned. See the rules.

KillerxXxQueen · Back to Top

The mockingbird sits
Squalling and carrying on
No prejudice here [Plz, k thnx bai]

I'm feeling profound
Sitting on top of mankind
They are being squished

I feel enlightened
The accomplishments of man
Seem terribly small

Time to awaken
Forget everything you know
Nothing is the same

I cannot find rest
Insomnia reigns supreme
I'm so damn tired

The night sky governs
The stars sing with merriment
We watch as they fall

I hear you leaving
You'll be back in the morning
That's what your note says

Midnight breathes music
Listen to the sultry chimes
There are only twelve

PrinceoftheLostEternity · Back to Top

I hate computer apps.
How pointless is this bullshit?
Band class For The Win.

I hadn't a clue.
I saw it, but ignored it.
Ignorance is bliss.

I remember it,
The day that it all came down.
It ended in fire.

You seem very ill.
Your mind isn't healthy now.
Insanity reigns.

I chewed gum today.
My jaw was sore from chewing.
Spit it the fuck out!

PrinceoftheLostEternity · Back to Top

Graduation blows
The school needs to stop the shit.
I hate this damn town...

TheOnlyFlorence · Back to Top

Go and find a muse.
Study them, make them, use them.
Congrats, you've made porn.

My hands are sticky.
White goop lingers on fingers.
Papercrafts kick ass.

Filming poetry
Readings are boring as fuck.
Symbols everywhere.

I hide in a room.
This Thing is nailing that girl.
Crazy Pyramid.

"That is the question.
Whether 'tis nobler in the
Mind to suffer......" LINE!

Alfred Yankovic:
Master of polkas, lyrics,
and Grapefruit Diets.

Screw this microphone!
Why won't it do what I say?!
Hey, You! Pikachu!

Thy beauty, fair gal,
Inspires me to create.
Musuem Curator.

I have no idea
What the hell I'm doing here.
Little House Christmas.

Plastic containers
Hold the secret of my life.
Fibromyalgia.

Simplify, my friend.
Condense your big thoughts into
A Five-Seven-Five.

Last edited by TheOnlyFlorence (10-25-2012 11:08:41 AM)

Nova · Back to Top

Eat more bran they said,
This week I learned Raisin Bran
Makes my anus bleed.

satyreyes · Back to Top

My open mic night once experimented with themed challenges, and the first challenge was to write haiku about bodily functions. Because I just can't get enough constraints, I also adopted another one. Traditionally, haiku are seasonal poems; there should always be a cue in a traditional haiku that lets the reader know what season of the year it is. So here are eight seasonal haiku about bodily functions, given false dignity by beautiful kanji.

TheOnlyFlorence · Back to Top

Goddamn, Satyreyes,
Way to one-up all of us,
You masterful douche.

Now starts the awful
Self-loathing process, which will
Consume all of us.

Granted, I wish that
Your haiku was dirtier,
But to each their own.

It's like, how do we
Even compete with that, bro?
Cock-blocking en masse.

And then Myers-Briggs
Predicts my competition.
Damn ENTJ.

How best to begin
The self-hate after pwnage?
Seven Daughters' wine.

Last edited by TheOnlyFlorence (10-30-2012 03:15:54 PM)

satyreyes · Back to Top

Take heed, O Florence:
Pride and self-flagellation
Are not very Zen. emot-tongue

TheOnlyFlorence · Back to Top

But my dear Satyr,
Meditation means nothing
If I still get off.

Breaking the vulgar,
I often feel dumb after
Reading posts on here.

It is like I can't
Keep up, keep falling behind
As flowers get crushed.

Do males get mood swings?
If not, just tack one more on.
Yay, Cyclothymic...

Science has proven
Humans are pessimistic
After the sun sets.

Will that stop me from
Writing more non-sensical
Bullshit here? Hell no!

The best emotions
To write are the ones you feel,
And this is me, now.

I'm hardly needy,
But I feel my grip slipping
From the spinning world.

Am I brooding so?
Or do I analyze it
All with clarity?

Just as I crawl out
From beneath heavy burdens,
Stomped on yet again.

Aren't metaphors
The best things ever designed?
Allusions, too, ya'll.

Hermitage doesn't
Suit me, but it's viable
To those that just gawk.

Will I feel better
If I sleep for a couple?
Haven't yet, so why?

Depression, loathing,
Typing, and a pinch of angst
Make a shitty stew.

In one hand, we have
The Supremes, whom I ask to
Bite my metal ass.

In the other, this
Woman taunts me to no end,
Mocking my attempts.

Dear Silver Lining,
Please don't disappear for good.
Sincerely, Florence.

I started writing
This twenty minutes ago.
Shit, I'm writing fast.

Deep sigh, to repeat,
Condense your big thoughts into
A Five... Seven... Five...

#1 | Back to Top05-15-2009 04:10:29 PM

Haiku for the Win!

#2 | Back to Top05-15-2009 08:58:37 PM

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#3 | Back to Top05-16-2009 09:56:51 AM

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#4 | Back to Top05-16-2009 09:51:54 PM

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#7 | Back to Top05-17-2009 11:41:37 AM

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#8 | Back to Top05-18-2009 08:51:47 AM

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#9 | Back to Top05-22-2009 08:12:45 PM

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#10 | Back to Top10-25-2012 11:08:07 AM

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#11 | Back to Top10-25-2012 05:44:27 PM

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#12 | Back to Top10-29-2012 11:25:55 PM

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#13 | Back to Top10-30-2012 03:15:03 PM

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