This is a static copy of In the Rose Garden, which existed as the center of the western Utena fandom for years. Enjoy. :)

#1 | Back to Top10-08-2010 04:24:43 PM

chrisb
Eternal Eschatologist
From: Tx,USA
Registered: 01-18-2010
Posts: 956

Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20101008/ap_ … g_one_town

When did US schools turn into Japanese schools? The increase of suicides due to bullying really worry me about how my younger relatives are doing in school.

I support the parents in suing the school. Bullying is mostly ignored by school staff and rarely are the bullies punished. 

I don't know what can be done about the new bullying wave but something has to be done.

Where has this all come from? When did kids start thinking it was ok to push their peers to death and not care?


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#2 | Back to Top10-08-2010 06:15:52 PM

Riri-kins
World's End
From: Cloud Nine
Registered: 09-22-2008
Posts: 2354

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

I saw this on the news, and it makes me livid as a former bullying victim.  The thing is that some parents need to face the fact that their child may be teasing other children very painfully. I hope the ones who tortured those poor kids get what's coming to them.


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#3 | Back to Top10-08-2010 08:52:26 PM

BlackBeforeRed
Acknowledged Smart Person
From: The Nightosphere
Registered: 07-09-2010
Posts: 178

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

Couldn't agree more Riri-kins. I suffered for years at the hands of bullies and my school couldn't have cared less until I started having serious issues. The sad part is most schools don't care until a kid hangs themselves, when they could have prevented the whole situation emot-mad

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#4 | Back to Top10-09-2010 06:32:42 AM

liberrrty
Miki Molester
From: The land of the white rose
Registered: 08-31-2010
Posts: 39

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

I hope the parents win the case.

How could you be so cruel to laugh at someone's corpse? Especially considering you probably played a major role in thier death.

I'm at a loss for words.


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#5 | Back to Top10-09-2010 07:17:38 AM

satyreyes
no, definitely no cons
From: New Orleans, Louisiana
Registered: 10-16-2006
Posts: 10328
Website

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

Many of the teens who have taken their own lives recently after being viciously bullied have been LGBT, or perceived as such by the bullies.  I'm sure many people on the forum probably already know this, but Dan Savage -- sex columnist and fierce gay advocate -- has responded to the suicides with his It Gets Better Project.  It's a collection of YouTube videos aimed at the victims of this bullying.  High schoolers and adults who are LGBT assure the viewers that "it gets better" -- if they can just live long enough, they'll be able to get out of the asshole school or bigoted household or town that's making them miserable, and once they get to college they'll find a welcoming community of queer folk and straight allies who will value them for who they are.  It's gotten some coverage in the media and it seems to be really reaching people.  I think it's a great project, and I hope vIRGins with something to say on the subject will consider making videos of their own.  etc-love

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#6 | Back to Top10-09-2010 08:26:39 AM

Hiraku
Easter Elf #40
From: Singapore
Registered: 02-21-2007
Posts: 6342
Website

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

It's kinda sad, when the suicide doesn't just revolve around LGBT. Back then, whenever I see news report about people being bullied to death, it usually has to do with the victim being homosexual. With Sladjana's death, it's clear that this can happen to ANYONE. emot-frown

When I was bullied, it wasn't even because of my sexuality (I didn't even know what I was anyway). It was because I was foreign and socially awkward.

And, it was ridiculous. Those people laughing at the way she looks at her funeral. ... They'll get what's coming to them. Assuming they have a soul, that is.

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#7 | Back to Top10-09-2010 09:35:16 AM

Android raptor
Rose Smilee
From: North GA, USA
Registered: 08-11-2009
Posts: 126
Website

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

Bullies aren't just at school either. One thing I'd like to see get more recognition is how devastating bullying/psychological abuse is when it's at the hands of the kids own caregivers. I know from first hand experience that the system doesn't take that shit seriously at all, especially if the mother is the abuser it seems like the first reaction of authority figures is blaming the kid for doing something to deserve it (not that it's more than a little fucked up for a mother to call her kid "retarded" and a host of other wonderful things on a daily basis).

Bullying is wrong no matter who the perpetrator is, and all bullies should be held accountable no matter what relation they have to their victim.

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#8 | Back to Top10-09-2010 05:38:51 PM

spoon-san
Someday Shiner
Registered: 03-18-2009
Posts: 3423

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

Android raptor wrote:

Bullies aren't just at school either. One thing I'd like to see get more recognition is how devastating bullying/psychological abuse is when it's at the hands of the kids own caregivers..

QFT.  I know how absolutely painful that sort of thing is and admittedly planned on attempting suicide a few times but backed down. 

Bullying is horrible, regardless who it happens to or why it happens.  I also plan to check out the It Gets Better Project.

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#9 | Back to Top10-09-2010 06:41:43 PM

Melancholic_Soul
Dancer Romancer
From: VA
Registered: 04-28-2009
Posts: 1514

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

I can't understand how people let this happen. Looking back there was always someone who took the time to care, even if that someone was a complete stranger. There are so many people who are willing to spend time and energy on helping kids feel confident enough to take a stand against bullying. It angers me that these people exist but we somehow allow our children to experience life without those types of mentors around. That's not right. Through teachers, family, coaches, instructors and school, we widen the area of exposure for our kids. If your kid comes to you and you can't do anything, the school can't do anything, or the bullying party's parental units can't do anything, then maybe we should be looking into other alternatives for the victimized and the bullies themselves.


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v476/anthy_utena/rukasan.gif Believing in the power of Love and Justice since 1999
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#10 | Back to Top10-09-2010 06:54:35 PM

Hiraku
Easter Elf #40
From: Singapore
Registered: 02-21-2007
Posts: 6342
Website

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

It's precisely because it feels as if no one can do anything for you anymore, that some people contemplated suicide. Or, something like this might show up: http://jigokutsushin.awardspace.info/

I swear, there are times when I thought "THAT" was a good idea.

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#11 | Back to Top10-09-2010 09:36:17 PM

Anthiena
Egghead
From: ...the space between your ears
Registered: 10-21-2006
Posts: 1108

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

satyreyes wrote:

Many of the teens who have taken their own lives recently after being viciously bullied have been LGBT, or perceived as such by the bullies.  I'm sure many people on the forum probably already know this, but Dan Savage -- sex columnist and fierce gay advocate -- has responded to the suicides with his It Gets Better Project.  It's a collection of YouTube videos aimed at the victims of this bullying.  High schoolers and adults who are LGBT assure the viewers that "it gets better" -- if they can just live long enough, they'll be able to get out of the asshole school or bigoted household or town that's making them miserable, and once they get to college they'll find a welcoming community of queer folk and straight allies who will value them for who they are.  It's gotten some coverage in the media and it seems to be really reaching people.  I think it's a great project, and I hope vIRGins with something to say on the subject will consider making videos of their own.  etc-love

...actually, I read the article where it was placed and it was actually done by someone else (I need to find the article to get specific) but it was someone writing in, feeling that it suited Dan Savage's articles and sympathies.

I myself was teased. I was called about my hand-me-down clothes. According to my classmates, I lived in a dumpster. I was also called stupid and retarded. I was also ignored in high school utterly. None of them, however, knew what I was going through at home. I think, had I spoken, people would have had a very different opinion of me.

Or not.


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I want to become someone who can exercise power. I want to become a prince. - Ikuni

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#12 | Back to Top10-09-2010 10:18:58 PM

satyreyes
no, definitely no cons
From: New Orleans, Louisiana
Registered: 10-16-2006
Posts: 10328
Website

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

Anthiena wrote:

...actually, I read the article where it was placed and it was actually done by someone else (I need to find the article to get specific) but it was someone writing in, feeling that it suited Dan Savage's articles and sympathies.

The article is here, and the project is Dan's.

I'm sorry about your school experiences. emot-frown  I got teased a lot in lower and middle school for being a crybaby, which was true, but in high school I was pretty much left to myself.  Lucky me!

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#13 | Back to Top10-09-2010 10:23:02 PM

Hiraku
Easter Elf #40
From: Singapore
Registered: 02-21-2007
Posts: 6342
Website

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

I remembered that when I was being teased/bullied, it wasn't anything physical, but yeah, people thought I was retarded/stupid idiot. I was a bit more upset at the fact that my friends didn't support me much in all this, and a couple of them even went along when they're in public.

One of them told me at one time on aim, "You never stood up for yourself."

What... the... fuck... emot-gonk At least I had a dart board for target practice back in high school.

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#14 | Back to Top10-10-2010 04:36:05 AM

Maarika
Someday Shiner
From: Estonia
Registered: 10-17-2006
Posts: 2510
Website

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

Android raptor wrote:

Bullying is wrong no matter who the perpetrator is, and all bullies should be held accountable no matter what relation they have to their victim.

I agree, however punishing someone will not solve the problem. Bullying will continue to be an issue unless the problem is addressed on the level of its root cause. One of the causes being the overall inequality in society that is perpetuated by the socio-economic systems we have. Children are not taught what equality means, and that all human beings deserve fair treatment. One look at what kind of values we have is enough to understand why these issues won't go away.

Therefore, rather than punishment, these kids need further education and we must attempt to understand why they did what they did so we can learn from it in order to change our attitudes accordingly and prevent these things from happening again. Some of my best friends in school were regularly bullied, and the victims could use all the support they could (which they often times don't have). Children are not taught how to deal with these things, and most of them are not aware of why these things happen in the first place. It's not because someone is gay, poor, fat, ugly, different etc., but if you are bullied, you may hang onto these identities and think something is wrong with you. You may falsely think that this is what causes it. And it's not once you take a look at the bigger picture.


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#15 | Back to Top10-11-2010 08:13:09 AM

Like_Autumn
Network Ninja
Registered: 07-18-2007
Posts: 639
Website

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

I HATE BULLYING. Yes, that deserves all caps. And I hate how a lot of these school districts care only about not offending any side in an "ideological debate."

News flash, school administrators. This is NOT about political agendas or ideology. This is about real students who are losing their lives because you care more about being "neutral" than helping them.

What kind of world is this when schools care more about politics than the lives of their own students?

UUUUURRGHHH.

God, when I become a teacher, fighting bullying will be one of my main projects.

Last edited by Like_Autumn (10-11-2010 08:13:42 AM)


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#16 | Back to Top10-11-2010 03:16:16 PM

OnlyInThisLight
KING OF ALL DUCKS
Registered: 01-15-2008
Posts: 4412

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

BUT WAIT, IF SCHOOLS PAY ATTENTION TO BULLYING THEN WHO WILL CARE ABOUT SPORTS??????

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#17 | Back to Top10-12-2010 01:53:25 AM

chrisb
Eternal Eschatologist
From: Tx,USA
Registered: 01-18-2010
Posts: 956

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

Like many of you have said the thing that angers me the most is teachers RARELY do anything about bullying. Their job isn't only to teach, it's to protect their students from harm. Parents put their kids in the hands of a school to learn and kept safe, not be tortured.


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#18 | Back to Top10-12-2010 11:06:12 PM

Razara
Marionette Mistress
From: Wuzzy Happy Akio Town (What?)
Registered: 10-17-2006
Posts: 4694

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

All schools really need a strict policy in regards to bullying, both aggressive and passive-aggressive. Bullying will probably always be an issue, but some schools do less to prevent it than others, and that is not acceptable.

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#19 | Back to Top10-13-2010 11:23:59 AM

Emiemipoemi
Troublesome Insect
Registered: 12-10-2006
Posts: 649

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

Both my parents are teachers and I mentioned to them about the whole bullying thing, and they said one of the biggest problems they have as teachers when it comes to bullying is the kids who are being bullied RARELY say anything to the teachers. It's hard to do something when you don't know it's happening. emot-frown

Last edited by Emiemipoemi (10-13-2010 11:24:17 AM)

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#20 | Back to Top10-13-2010 04:10:50 PM

spoon-san
Someday Shiner
Registered: 03-18-2009
Posts: 3423

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

Emiemipoemi wrote:

Both my parents are teachers and I mentioned to them about the whole bullying thing, and they said one of the biggest problems they have as teachers when it comes to bullying is the kids who are being bullied RARELY say anything to the teachers. It's hard to do something when you don't know it's happening. emot-frown

This. 

It's too bad that kids being bullied have to feel that they will be bullied more and ostracized for telling, but when you think about it, at least from my viewpoint, you don't need to put up with people's shit.  If they are giving you a hard time in the midst of a life which is hard enough as it is, you should feel free and dignified in taking an approach which minimizes the problem with the minimal amount of frustration, hence getting teachers and faculty involved.  If people are coming to your house and lighting literal crap on fire on your door step and keep on doing that, you shouldn't have to feel like a priss for calling the police.  Why would anyone want to waste time and energy dealing with harassment from some immature clods? 

Well, that's my take, anyways.

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#21 | Back to Top10-15-2010 03:39:03 AM

CausalityStar
Caretaker
From: Idaho
Registered: 09-12-2010
Posts: 215

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

I support this lawsuit 100%. I also support prosecution and jail time for these bullies, even though I know that won't happen. I think bullying is definitely a serious problem and schools really need to do more about it. I know that there are a lot of underlying causes to it too, and that most of it is done against people who do anything outside of what is perceived as normal, to try to make them conform.

I didn't have too many problems myself in high school and middle school, but I was made fun of a lot in elementary school because I didn't make eye contact with people and I had to take speech classes for a while. When I hit puberty, people also made fun of me for having giant boobs and because I was a little bit overweight. It was mostly immature boys who did the last part and of course once they hit puberty, suddenly I was awesome and hot.

While I didn't have that many problems in high school and neither did anyone I knew, I can't speak for everyone. I did come out as being mostly lesbian in high school (which means that nearly all of the people I like are girls, but I will make exceptions for certain girly or pretty boys.) However I didn't get bullied too much for that, probably because I had some friends who were bigger than me and could have easily beaten up anyone who made trouble with me. Not to mention, I used to be good at screwing with people's heads if they tried to mess with me and that usually made it so no one picked on me more than once.


I know that compared to other LBGT kids I got lucky, so I think we definitely need more anti-bullying laws. If you consider that bullying includes harassment and sometimes assault, I don't think that there should be any exception to those things being punished by law, just because they occur at school.

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#22 | Back to Top10-16-2010 08:28:59 PM

Syora
Presidential Accoster
From: Under Northern Lights
Registered: 06-07-2009
Posts: 1866

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

So I just found the It Gets Better project (hilariously from another thread), and here is one of my favorites from a politician in Texas: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ax96cghOnY4

Edit: because I am sporadically illiterate

Last edited by Syora (10-16-2010 08:31:53 PM)

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#23 | Back to Top10-17-2010 12:08:14 AM

Katzenklavier
Wondrous Sexual Eggplant.
From: Back of your thoughts.
Registered: 09-13-2008
Posts: 1120

Re: Recent wave of suicides due to bullying

Like_Autumun: God, when I become a teacher, fighting bullying will be one of my main projects.

That is a very admirable goal, and often, the guidance of an authority figure can make all the difference. Everyone needs a role model they can identify with. There are lot of young people coming out that not only are tormented at school, but are told every day of their home life that there's something inherently evil about them. Compound the two and there's a sense of not having any safe haven at all. At my high school, we went around after school and asked teachers if they'd be willing to put rainbow stickers on their doors that would indicate that they would be willing to mentor their students, not only in terms of sexuality but also for race, disability, economic status, etc. A lot of people flat-out refused. But a couple were willing to even host the local gay advocacy club. Just finding those few can make all the difference.

Last edited by Katzenklavier (10-17-2010 12:09:25 AM)


We must go forward, not backward. Upward, not forward. And always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom.

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