oh...just so people dont freak..when i posted the "hey guess what i just did" i was refering to the hot, sweaty, sexy erotic....D&D session i had!

it was a nail biter!

Giovanna wrote:

Those are like D&D for Dummies, I just learned more about the game than piles and piles of books taught me!

That's why it's perfect for Utena roleplay!

Well... Not really.

I've gotten horribly jaded about peoples attention spans... Last group I tried to start a game with couldn't just sit and read all the rules... Cause ya know.. it's SO HARD to figure out what a modifier is. ><

And Twinks are evil. At least in WoW they tend to be easier to spot.. ya know... since they GLOW.

And what, may I ask, is wrong with attacking the darkness?

The best character I ever played was a neurotic elf-bitch named Nomine Domino (it was a pun, I couldn't think of what to call her, so I named her 'name' and then tacked on domino because a domino is a type of mask), played in a homebrew setting. I don't remember her stats right off hand, but she was a barrel of laughs. Nomine was the bodyguard of the elven princess (whom she was fanatically devoted to), a devotee of Imriel, the elven goddess of protection, the home, poison, and murder (whom she was even MORE fanatically devoted to), a shadowdancer, and completely unaware of and unwilling to learn anything about sex or love.

It was awful, but in the good way. Nomine was a manipulative, scheming bitch who only had the good of the elven nation and the good of her goddess in mind, and got completely thrown for a loop whenever sex came into the game. I was playing with perhaps the best foil I've ever had in a game-- my friend Tayte, playing a character called Aust who was basically a complete raging maniac, looked like a barbarian but was actually a druid, and was the future heir to the throne of the elven nation. He wanted to kill just about everything in sight, and Nomine wanted to manipulate and keep just about everything in sight as a pet, so they were always at odds. When the chips were down, though, they were inseparable. Aust even murdered a roomful of children for Nomine (they were evil children, so it was okay), and she almost bartered away her virginity to a guy who got off on beating the shit out of chicks to save Aust from dying of an enchanted plague. He wouldn't let her do it.

We also got off a couple of good moments during gameplay... they're probably not funny now, but I'm going to subject you to them anyway.



(after a battle we almost died in)

Player1: I chase the dragon!

Player2: You idiot, we're in no shape to catch up to them!

Nomine: (OOC) I still have my tiny dwarf in a jar, right?

DM: Yes.

Nomine: I SHAKE MY TINY DWARF AT HIM



(during the session where Nomine almost swapped away her virginity)

Nomine: What do you mean, spend the night with me? I really don't think we have that much to talk about.

The Rake: .....I had something more in mind than discussion.

Aust: NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

Nomine: Well whatever it is, just say it straight. I'm tired of dancing around the subject.

The Rake: I... WANT... TO... SLEEP... WITH... YOU.

Aust: NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

Nomine: ....sleep? With me? ......I don't understand. What in Imriel's name would be the point?

The Rake: ...I can see why you're still a virgin

Aust: HE WANTS TO FUCK YOU, YOU IDIOT

Nomine: ......oh. .........why?

The Rake: Because it's fun.

Nomine: *absolutely venomous* I don't like fun.



(after Aust was turned into a woman)

Nomine: ....you know, Aust... you need to wash down there sometimes or you start to smell.

Aust: Nuh-uh.

Nomine: Oh god, just do it. That is so disgusting-- you're gonna have to do it sometime!

Aust: NUH-UH!

Nomine: WHY NOT?

Aust: *wipes his finger between his legs, sniffs it* I'm baking a cake.

Nomine:



(Aust, having sex with a druid, both of them able to shapechange)

Aust: I'M A BEAR! I'M A BEAR! YOU'RE A BEAR! I'M A BEAR! *horrible gargling bear orgasm sounds*

Nomine (in her room across the hall): Imriel, please shut them up or I swear I will die right now

Oh, don't be sore, I didn't know whether you wanted to be mentioned or not since you've said you want to play instead of DM.

KissingT.Kiryuu wrote:

which brings me to, has anyone ever played in a campaign so realistic that they had to go into battle pregnant?

Yes!!!

Wait.... no. I've never played Dungeons and Dragons.

But back when I played a forum based RPG I got one of my characters knocked up. In a completely unrealistic way. With a world destroying cannibalistic baby.

i would have never had sex if i didnt start playing D&D! thats how i met my BF.

Isn't it? That's adorable. I love it.

This is so cool. I've wanted to play D&D forever; I have no idea how to. With happy chirstmas money, I will buy something basic and figure it out. (Also, I need to lear Magic the Gathering so I can play Utena the Gathering.)

KissingT.Kiryuu wrote:

at local toy stores ive seen the lame-o D&D "starter kit"  that comes with dice, maps, beginer adventures, pre-done character sheets and even some of the minitures that some people play with. (i dont)

Why is that lame?    If I'm just starting D&D, the things you listed are exactly what I need.  The maps and adventures wouldn't be necessary if I had access to an experienced DM, but if I had that I probably wouldn't need the starter kit.  The pre-done character sheets are a little cheesy, but it's nice to be able to grab a sheet and play the game more or less right out of the box.  I can get into character generation once I decide I'm interested in the game, rather than spend hours figuring out the rules, rolling up a character, and then discovering I'm bored.  As for miniatures... I don't use them, but sometimes I use coins when the position of the characters becomes relevant, and they can be useful for newbies.

cause this is the D&D thread i decided to state that D&D is actually holding my relationship with my BF together. we live to DM eachother but we fight so much. im difficult to DM i guess.... 

it does, i totally told him we have boring sex in a session of D&D and apparently he got the hint!

Anybody out there know any DMs that are "Wish Lawyers?" For those not in the know, I'll elaborate.

A Wish Lawyer holds you to the letter whenever your mage casts the "Wish" spell (9th level, I'm not too sure). For example, if you say "I wish I had a huge diamond in my hand," the diamond appears...INSIDE YOUR FREAKING HAND! You must now have your diamond surgically removed and your hand reconstructed. Nice.

Another example was wishing for a million platinum pieces to appear. They appeared...above the character. He took 1 hit point for every coin that brained him, and died under the onslaught of greed.

And yet another idiot forgot to wish for eternal youth ALONG WITH eternal life. He's a 700 year old mage who can't move because of arthritis and other conditions of aging. I'd be surprised if he remembered where he kept his spellbook!

FYI, I never participated in these, or any other, sessions of D&D. I hate the structure, and I like to play games my own way...