This is a static copy of In the Rose Garden, which existed as the center of the western Utena fandom for years. Enjoy. :)
-please read-
Thank you,
Friday , February 23rd 2007 I with two of my friends were attacked outisde a hometown convience store. We were attacked by a group of 8-15 girls. The girls violated us in ways unimaginable, they fought with a malcious intent that I can not shake from my psyche. I went to the hospital with a bloody nose,bruised eye and multiple head injuries. It could have been a lot worse, I could have been killed. And for what reason, no apparent reason. These girls violated a safety that I will never recover. I've always been told to fear men and the physical power they may use against you, but never young women or women in general. Specifically women of my own race. And not that race has anything to do with this, but it hurts all the more. In a world where there is violence committed against women every day in places that seem far away, in situations that leave a horrible scar on those involved, I now bear one. I was carrying the VDay Logo bag when it happened. Ironically the bag has my blood spilled all over it. Until the violence stops. Until the violence stops. Those girls did not stop for me, for any of my friends. We filed a police report and because of th laws in California nothing can really be done because they are minors. I've always been an advocator of justice , and rights, but with this incident I cringe that I might be one to say there is no justice in this world. I do not want a pity party, I want understanding, I want people to know these girls will grow into women, violent young women who will be able to attack another with little or no regard whatsoever. As much as vengeance has crossed my mind, violence does not solve violence. I now walk with fear where I had no fear, I now have anger where there was little anger. I want to cry but the tears have come too often. I need to share my story and I need to know somewhere that someone can make a difference. I look in the mirror and I see the bruise on my face and I know someone fucking did this. Somebody did this to me. Violence is never OK.
I just want my voice to be heard.
Offline
Was there a reason to this random act of violence, or is California just a fucked up state, period?
My suggestion, get the fuck out of California. It's one of the most unsafe places to live.
And from my reasoning, there should be no reason to be attacked unless it was caused
but a word said, or a racial dispute. Something must have sparked this, it doesn't make any sense.
WHY?!
Offline
Jesus, I don't even know what the hell to say about that. It's true that minors get away with this all the time, it's not even considered a big deal in some places. I'm sorry such a thing had to happen to you and your friends. :hug: You're certainly heard here, if not the California justice system. I wouldn't say something insulting like 'it's alright', because it really really isn't, but it'll get easier later. Until then, my thoughts are with you.
Offline
IceQueen, I am sorry this happened. There is nothing I can do or say to make it better, but we can at least listen here and we all care and are wishing you well. My best advice is for you to get out of there as soon as you can.
Offline
I, too, am speechless.
My heart goes out to you, IceQueen. I hope you and your friends recover, both physically and emotionally. Why must humans fight amongst themselves? What drives us?
What, indeed...
Offline
I also have no idea what to say. We're all just glad you're still here! There is no excuse for what happened to you and your friends.
Offline
Personal_IceQueen wrote:
-I just want my voice to be heard.
If you want your voice to be heard...I may have a solution....
Please pm me..if you'd like..
Offline
o.o
what "human being" in their right mind would do such a thing to someone so undeserving....
none....those girls are not fit to walk this earth if they think its ok to attack people at random... they are not humans...
i am as speechless as everyone else here after reading this....
i am absolutly disgusted with this world and most who inhabit it, i have been forced to sit on a pencil (dont ask) i have had various things dumped on me (pencil shavings, garbage cans) the usual pull the chair from underneath you...ive had friends betray me...but never have i ever been struck, or beaten by anyone at random...
something seriously needs to be done about such situations..but what.....
.......but what....
Offline
Oh, wow.. I can't think of what else to say that hasn't been said already. I'm really sorry. And I agree completely with your sentiment. Violence is never okay. Especially for no reason. Race doesn't have anything to do with it, really. That's just mean and cruel and inhuman that they did that to you and your friends.
I'm even more upset that they're not going to get punished. Those girls obviously need help if they just randomly violate and beat up people for fun. It's sick, and there's nothing to justify it.
Your message is definitely heard. Thank you. I hope everything improves, at least.
You know.. It's funny I should read this right after reading about a friend and her roommate getting their dorm door paintballed by some immature "college students". As I said there, I'm generally optimistic, but.. sometimes humanity just makes me really sad.
But on the bright side.. I look around this forum and see a group of really kind, intelligent people, so that makes me feel better, at least.
Offline
Do you by any chance live in the Bay Area? :O I live in Oakland, AKA the 8th most dangerous city in the US. I hear about stories like yours almost every day.
Anyways, my condolences. I hear you, and I have gotten myself into some bad situations myself. And it's not like the cops here help out much -_-; (No offense to people here who are on the police force.)
Offline
*hug*
Cause I think you need it.
Offline
I've heard a lot of things like that, but i can never picture it, i just can't imagine how it must be.
I'm really sorry. If you want some vacations you have a house in Spain
Offline
All I can really do is *hug* so there you go.
Offline
I am so, so sorry for the terrible experience that you and your friends had to go through. Ugliness comes in all forms. And there are people in the world, as you said, who just don't care at all. I commend you for not wanting to take revenge into your own hands. It takes a truly strong, brave person to not succumb to that level after you've been treated so maliciously. It is diappointing that not much can be done on the side of the law, but you can raise your voice. You can be heard, and a strenght to the anti-viloence movement. It is a brave act, sharing your story, and you should be proud of having that courage. They may try to hurt you, but they can't silence your voice. Keep being strong! Everyone here supports you.
Offline
Sorry about this and you are doing the right thing and talking about this we hear you and....just hugs.
Offline
I want to thank everyone for being really supportive and their concerns. I was a part of the Vagina Monologues and we added a piece about it, so, I just wanted to speak up. I know it happens to other people and it makes me upset so much to know that it goes on and on like this and not much is done. But I suppose to quote the cliche, what doesnt kill you, makes you stronger.
Offline
I'm glad you're letting others know about this. The more attention these things get, the better chance there is of fixing it. I don't know why those girls would have wanted to do something that horrible, but I do know that bringing attention to it is the best way to stop it. *hugs* Thank you for being so strong, IceQueen.
Offline
Sorry for replying this late, I read your post since you put it here but I didn't know what to say, what happened to you is just... horrible, sometimes I cannot understand how can people do such horrible things for not reason at all specially people as young. I am glad you were able to get away for this alive and that you are better now of your physical injuries. You did well at posting this, things like these can't be kept in silence.
My best wishes to you and I hope you never have to pass something like this again... actually I hope nobody to pass something like this...
Offline
Yasha wrote:
Thank you for being so strong, IceQueen.
Yes, that's right. Thank you for being so strong.
Offline
Personal_IceQueen wrote:
I was a part of the Vagina Monologues and we added a piece about it, so, I just wanted to speak up.
Actually if you're okay with talking about it at all, I'm really curious about this, what you did and how it went. Sounds like it was a very good experience for you.
Offline
For the performance, I wrote up a monologue about the incident and how it affected me emotionally and mentally. Some days I'm chipper some days I just want to get away from it all. But the monologue was really affecting I think, I gave my bag to display to the audience. But after three days, it was emotionally draining-to have to go back to that place and revisit it over and over again. All the women at the show were very supportive, and everyone gave me hugs to last a lifetime. But speaking up about it was needed, I tend to internalize my emotions, but I had to speak up because I would have gone crazy with rage and "why did this happen to me?" but if someone in the audience walked away understanding that violence isn't okay then for the most part that brings me a little peace.
Offline