This is a static copy of In the Rose Garden, which existed as the center of the western Utena fandom for years. Enjoy. :)
This is a continuation of something that started in General SKUpidity.
I recap for the sake of this thread.
A bit of the old Monty Python.(Paraphrased that is.)
Scene 21 of the Holy Grail
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Behold, the Dreaded Marmoset of Caerbannog
OMG! That's the most foul, cruel and bad-tempered rodent I have ever set eyes on.
We need the Holy Grenade of Antioch!
How does it work?
We must consult the Book of Armaments
Armaments, chapter two, verses nine to twenty-one:
"First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three.
No more and no less.
Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three.
Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three.
Five is right out...."
"...Once the number three, being the third number. Then thou shall lobbest thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it."
"Then thou shall lobbest thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it."
"One, Two, Five"
"No Three sir"
"Oh right..."
BOOOM!
The End
Now all we need is more people to do something along these lines including myself of course.
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If Akio did the same things as me if he played Fable II:
I miss my slutty Shiori waifu...
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RAZARA! THIS IS MADE OF WIN!
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This is the story of Goldilocks, paraphrased of cause.
and the Three Bears
This is Papa Bear
This is Mama Bear
and of cause Baby Bear.
"Oh dear, I think our meals are still too hot to eat, lets go out for a walk." said Mama Bear
"What a good idea" replied Baby Bear, "I need to practice my leet ninja skillz anyhows."
MEANWHILE......
Goldilocks was walking through the forest in the hopes of finding something to eat.
Luckily for her, she found the Bears House which she had to admit was one bitchin' pad.
She broke in and looked around until she found Mama Bear and Papa Bear's delicious curries.
Too bad it gave her severe heartburn.
She evenually recovered and lo and behold, she found Baby Bear's tasty treat:
Mamoset in a blanket!
"Should I risk more heartburn?" said Goldilocks
"I know" Goldilocks thought. "why dont I dip it in some nice cool icecream cake, no one ever gets heartburn eating iecream after all." she reasoned.
"Ah that was some quality grub" cooed Goldilocks as she leaned back on the chair.
MEANWHILE....
The Three Bears stumbled apon a tasty morsel...
And been ruthless bastard bears they were, they tore off all her clothes and hung her up to be ravished by their wanton appetites.
MEANWHILE....
After feasting on icecream caked promate, Goldilocks dozed off to a peaceful sleep...
...which was cut short by a renewed case of heartburn.
It was so painful, she fell into the heated spa and drowned.
FINALLY....
The Bears came back home, forgot why they even went out for in the first place and snacked on pocky.
THE END
So how was that?
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I try mu best.
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"Hey Anthy, there's a new joke goin' around: What did the five fingers say to the face?"
"I don't know. What?"
"SLAP! HA HA! I'M KYOUICHI SAIONJI, BITCH!"
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Let's get this old one (inspired by the caption contest) out of the way before posting some new ones. Hope you guys won't find this a bore.
P1
P2
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Last edited by Itsuke (06-07-2009 04:40:30 AM)
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LMAO!!!!
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*snorts out some of her brains, which splatters all over the keyboard*
...
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That was awesome! Every time I see that seen I'm always like.....aren't they afraid of going out the window!!
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hollow_rose wrote:
That was awesome! Every time I see that seen I'm always like.....aren't they afraid of going out the window!!
It's only a natural conclusion that both should fall straight out the window. Just imagine Touga calling an emergency meeting with the Student Council to discuss what should they do with the current Victor dead.
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Itsuke wrote:
It's only a natural conclusion that both should fall straight out the window. Just imagine Touga calling an emergency meeting with the Student Council to discuss what should they do with the current Victor dead.
That reminds me of a fanfic on Fanfiction.Net's archives that tells of how the duel game ended prematurely because of Utena's incompetence...
SPOILER
She finishes her second duel with Saionji and accidentally kills Anthy by stabbing the Sword of Dios into her heart, figuring that since it came out of her chest, that's how she should put it back.
/END SPOILER
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OnionPrince wrote:
"I see a little silhouetto of a man!"
"God, not this shit again..."
"Scaramouche!"
"Scaramouche!"
"Will you do the fandango?"
"Shut up. All of you."
"I'm just a poor boy and nobody loves me!"
"He's just a poor boy from a poor family!"
"Spare him his life from this monstrosity!"
"Ugh, this is the last time I let you pick the radio stations."
"Mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go! Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me... For meeee... For meeeeeeeeeee!"
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i rofl'd
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Last edited by Itsuke (05-04-2009 10:56:37 PM)
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Razara, I know you wrote yours a looooong time ago....but it always makes me LOL like crazy.
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lol nanami XDDDD
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