In the Rose Garden / On Unions Civil and Otherwise- Post-series fanfic, unfinished, linked

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

So, y'all.

First chapter is here.

Totally been up to this for a while.

Disclaimer and Content Warning:

Things that do not belong to me still do not belong to me.

Themes are adult in nature, and may include physical, emotional, and sexual abuse. There is a shit-ton of psychological fuckery. Nothing is explicit, and that's intentional-- it's significantly less explicit that And Surrender Unto Night, for example, though the stakes are probably higher. This is not a happy story. I try not to be all doom an' gloom, but if I'm being honest, even the sweeter moments exist primarily to showcase how bad things get when the shit hits the fan. Except for the planned ending, which is... kind of surprisingly not terrible. Proceed at your own discretion.

End Disclaimer

As far as my inspiration/influences for writing this: first of all, I found Archimage fantastically depressing, so maybe I wanted to fix it? I dunno, but the timing lines up and Saionji joined the military, and I don't think that was an accident. And WE VOTED FOR MARRIAGE EQUALITY! WOO! GO WASHINGTON STATE! And there was a very interesting sermon in church leading up to that about how marriage equality would, in fact, change the institution of marriage in a way that it very much needed to be changed. Not sure how much that theme comes through, though. Also Shinto is awesome, but my research has not been complete enough for the bits that actually relate to that to be written, I keep putting it off. And then I got a job, and there were kids, so I guess that's working its way in, too. GODDAMN KIDS.

In terms of content/technique goals, I want to portray a relationship that is right on the fucking edge, between what I'll leave up to interpretation, and I want it to be/read like a sort of mumblecore melodrama, and then of course there's the narrative structure, which is just downright odd. I seem to be gravitating towards vignettes in fanfic writing, that's what the "chapters" are, so some of them are going to be very short. And then there's perspective shifts on top of that. Yaaaaaaay.

Promise it's less terrible than the last one. For one, I've done some goddamned editing, so the Very Intentional Pronoun Confusion doesn't get lost in the sea of typos. If there was any Very Intentional Pronoun Confusion. There are totally bits that I actually like. Like the kid-aged-flashbacks. Those are adorable. Too bad there's not very many of them, and they start... like... I'm pretty sure I'm not going to write one that comes in before we get to Ohtori, and that happens twelve pages into a 30-page Word doc. And that's the part that makes any goddamn sense, because the rest is being written out of order, so there's some crazy time-skip shenanigans going on.

That's the good news. The bad news is... well, actually, that's the bad news: it makes sense chronologically, but I'm not writing it in that order. And I want to do some editing, so yeah, this is gonna update slower than frozen molasses, and I'll probably still publish (well, fanfic.net-publish) it with the time-skips. Confusion ahoy, but not for a little while. Or not, given the crack-tastic nature of the narrative structure. Post your wildest theories here!

But how this is gonna work is: I'm not gonna weigh the flow of the story down with incessant notes, I'll do all that here. And if you want a response on a response (please, please critique!) this is probably the place to stick it, since fanfic.net comments are more likely to get ignored.

And, uh, if anyone knows which Famous Dude said something about wanting to die by slitting his wrists in a hot bath, please let me know. I know it was a quote, but I don't remember the exact wording, and the subject is such that my search hasn't proved fruitful so far.

Aside from that, Chapter 1 notes:

Yeah, I need to do the chapter title thing. I know. I'll probably have some chapters with titles that happen when they're put up, some that get titles pretty quickly, and some that sit around with Chapter [insert chapter here] on them for ages.

And I've got some art in mind, but I haven't inked in ages, I don't know if I can even do the style, AAAAUGH FANFIC.NET DON'T TEMPT ME. Fanficcy visual art is not a rabbit hole I need to go down.

Yes, there is a playlist, again. I should probably figure out how to work 8-tracks so I could just set the whole damn thing up and post a link, but... I tried, it was a huge pain in the ass and didn't work like it was supposed to. So Chapter One has Sometime Around Midnight, by The Airborne Toxic Event and Yes by Coldplay.

As far as content goes, this is probably all you're gonna see of Miki until he shows up briefly to do a spit-take at, like, THE VERY END.

And drunk blackouts keep everything PG-13!

Possibly Humorous Tallies!

TOUGA DROWNED: (aka Please Disregard The Haunted Video Game) none so far
Everybody Got Cancer: none so far
And Then Touga Was a Chick: 2 (both in the playlist)

Last edited by Kita-Ysabell (01-29-2014 08:24:08 PM)

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

Posted Chapters 2-10.

Still fumbling about with the formatting for the note. It's not particularly clear at the moment.

Oh dear, now I have a whole bunch of chapter notes to do. Not sure how long this is gonna take.

As far as playlist goes, I kind of consider this whole segment to be kind of one unit, it's got songs that work for all of it. But not many. I considered posting it all as one chapter, to have chapters that are more like chapters and less like what the hell is this author up to, but some of the narrative WTF works better the further I stand from it, and I swear that makes sense in my head. But songs! People Who Die in the Desert by Liz Isenberg, Full Circle by Loreena McKennitt, and Matsukaze performed by Stan Richardson, which this is not, but there's some things that YouTube isn't very good about, and obscure white dudes performing traditional Japanese music for meditation is one of them. I think there's a TOUGA DROWNED count for the Liz Isenberg.

Chapter 2, which has been somewhat tentatively named "The Morning After."

This was originally part of the first part, but then I decided that the drunk blackout needed to be more of a hard division, and that I had nothing against putting what I'll call basic story segments back to back.

Chapter 3

Oh, yes, the second person narration. Hi there, neurotic second-person narration!

I'd originally meant it to only happen once- and not here- to strengthen the impact and WTF of the section, but then the mood worked so well, I just kept going with it.

Chapter 4

And here's the first person narration! That's three out of either four or five narrative voices in four chapters.

Aside from that, well, I am trying to write as if this is translated from Japanese, because hey, I'm trying to make it believably take place in Japan. I get the sense that I'm terrible at it, mind.

Chapter 5

Yeah, I have pretty much nothing to say about this.

Why is it not in first person? I'm not entirely sure.

There's also some ambiguous sentence organization, that's intentional.

Chapter 6

Hoo, boy.

Another really, really short chapter. I'm increasingly inclined to think that they aren't chapters, and shouldn't even get chapter titles.

And here we get a bit of discussion on what the phrase "The Ends of the World" means, and what the implications of that are or might be for the characters. It has to do with what I've heard of as "Leveling": a technique of propaganda in which the argument builds up a conceit for the purpose of tearing it down, thus falsely implying that what is said after the fake conceit is deconstructed is not itself a conceit. Or, stated another way, "the lie that revealing a lie also reveals the truth."

This is kind of my excuse to make the plot happen, and kind of something I think Akio actually does in-series.

Chapter 7

Ah, Juri. I have her acting as a bit of a naive prophet, in that she says things that other characters take as significant in ways that she did not intend them to be. Also this characterization of her is drawn as much from my perception of her as something of a lesbian icon amid the fandom as what I think she might actually be like ten years later.

And this is the school that Saionji's attending.

And that job offer that Juri got... Yeah, you should take note of that.

Hrm, I should probably say that this is what I think Miki's been up to: He's a nuclear physicist, probably in the field of weapons engineering. Hence he had to get a security clearance, and Saionji's military record turned up on it. But those aren't the only closed doors he lives his life behind! He has a habit of sleeping with his coworkers and/or their spouses. Usually and.

If you now wish that this story was about Miki, well, I made my theory of his exploits a bit cracktastic largely because he's pretty much Sir Not Appearing in this Story.

Chapter 8

I have nothing to say about this.

Chapter 9

I actually rather like this section. Wrote it at fuckall o'clock, but I think it turned out well.

Ah Anthy. Back to instigating, I see.

Chapter 10

I love this one. I really do.

The psychological underpinnings are so enjoyably terrible, and the language is just so... flamboyant.

And with that, we would return to Ohtori, but there's some dialog that's sort of taken a trip to Flying-Off-the-Handle-ville, and I want to see if I can get that spiffied up before posting it.

Tallies!

TOUGA DROWNED: 1
Everybody Got Cancer (and shit): none so far
And Then Touga Was a Chick: 2

Last edited by Kita-Ysabell (03-25-2013 07:39:09 PM)

gorgeousshutin · Back to Top

And I've got some art in mind, but I haven't inked in ages, I don't know if I can even do the style, AAAAUGH FANFIC.NET DON'T TEMPT ME. Fanficcy visual art is not a rabbit hole I need to go down.

Hmm . . . if you're interested in inserting "Fanficcy visual art" into the story via img links, especially right into the text, then AO3 is likely a place you'd want to post at.

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

gorgeousshutin wrote:
And I've got some art in mind, but I haven't inked in ages, I don't know if I can even do the style, AAAAUGH FANFIC.NET DON'T TEMPT ME. Fanficcy visual art is not a rabbit hole I need to go down.
Hmm . . . if you're interested in inserting "Fanficcy visual art" into the story via img links, especially right into the text, then AO3 is likely a place you'd want to post at.

Nope, not so much. It's just that Fanfic.net has a "cover art" feature, and I have nothing that I want to put there. At least, nothing that exists at the moment.

Yasha · Back to Top

Read it through!

To get this out of the way first, there's a spelling error on in Chapter 3. Should be "or losing your temper," not "or loosing your temper". Grammar and spelling regularly make me scream out loud, I can't help picking up on them, sorry, I'm a horrible person etc etc etc. It's wrong though.

Phew. Now that I have satisfied my compulsiveness...

Your Touga so far is very impressively a sexy bastard, and he and Saionji sleeping together for the first time after a fight is one hundred percent believable. Your Saionji is very angsty, which I have always taken him to be, but it's neat to get a window into his mind. Could use a little more dialogue, though-- I'd love to see an example of him at work or in his daily life instead of being told about it. I suspect that would go against the mood you're trying to set here, though, so I'm interested in what's coming.

Trying to write as if it's a translation, that's something I've never thought of. The awkwardness around the edges does seem as if one's trying to fit concepts from one language into another, so I'd say you succeeded nicely.

All in all, I'm definitely interested to see what comes next. And you're making me feel guilty for not finishing the little blurb I had started last September...

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

Yasha wrote:
To get this out of the way first, there's a spelling error on in Chapter 3. Should be "or losing your temper," not "or loosing your temper". Grammar and spelling regularly make me scream out loud, I can't help picking up on them, sorry, I'm a horrible person etc etc etc. It's wrong though.

Phew. Now that I have satisfied my compulsiveness...

Thanks, fixed that.

I have actually done some editing, so I tried to pick up on things like this, but I have come to the conclusion that I am probably pretty terrible at spelling, so I apologize in advance for all the errors that are bound to crop up.

Yasha wrote:
Could use a little more dialogue, though-- I'd love to see an example of him at work or in his daily life instead of being told about it. I suspect that would go against the mood you're trying to set here, though, so I'm interested in what's coming.

Well, it isn't helped that in all the bits that are up, Saionji pretty much has no one to talk to. But I suspect the whole thing will end up a bit claustrophobic and stream-of-consciousness-y. Possibly the characters have been mislabeled, and this is in fact an OC fic about Saionj's apartment and Saionji's front door. I guess that's where the mumblcore melodrama thing comes in? As far as daily life... maybe. Once I figure out what the hell that entails.

Yasha wrote:
Trying to write as if it's a translation, that's something I've never thought of. The awkwardness around the edges does seem as if one's trying to fit concepts from one language into another, so I'd say you succeeded nicely.

There was a point where I thought there was too much space car language. And there was. I think I've cleaned it up a bit now.

Yasha wrote:
All in all, I'm definitely interested to see what comes next. And you're making me feel guilty for not finishing the little blurb I had started last September...

Whelp, it's between this and getting that story done that might actually be publishable, of course I chose this, so don't feel too bad.

And as far as things coming next, I'll probably post what's written so far, (with time skip notices where appropriate) or at least through the cat. Which needs a name, but guess who has no clue whatsoever when it comes to Japanese names?

Yasha · Back to Top

Well, if it's Saionji's cat he'd name it the most traditional, unimaginative name possible, and then act like the cat was the biggest nuisance in the world, until it died, at which point he would be devastated and insist on giving the cat a place on the family shrine, all the while keeping a traditional japanesu impassive demeanor (that would fray around the edges whenever he got choked up).

As for Touga, he would probably name his cat a French or Italian name that had some significance to him. My headcanon says that he has two cats, one a modern style siamese, you know, the really angular neurotic kind, named Apollonie, and a compact, quiet little black one named Jeanne. They're named after the most important lovers of Charles Baudelaire. Of course, they are both female.

And the point of writing all this down? Because I hope you get a laugh out of it. And I hope it might inspire you with the kitteh name, even if it's inspiration in the "no, definitely not like that" direction emot-smile

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

Posted Chapter 11.

Now I'll probably take a break from posting, and go write up the things that happen between here and the next bit that's written.

And thus begins our time at Ohtori! Well, the narrative's time, anyways. I should probably mention that Chapter 9 has its own song! And that song is Don't Worry, We'll Be Watching You by Gotye.

But back to Ohtori! Songs for this section: Butou no Eros, The Ghost Inside by Broken Bells, (And Then Touga was a Chick count +1) Smoke and Mirrors by Gotye, Fire by Delta Rae, (And Then Touga was a Chick count +1) Warning Sign by Coldplay, Age of Kings by The Mountain Goats, Captain Badass, which appears to be by Songs: Ohia, (no, I don't know, but And Then Touga Was a Chick count +1 anyways) and Without a Word by Birdy.

Chapter notes:

I dunno if white cars are still a thing in Japan, but when my parents were there, that was the only color of car that anyone would buy.

Ah, Saionji/Kanae. I might ship it, it's so odd. Clearly, the similarity of hair colors means they were meant to be together!

And I'm really fond of the descriptions of the campus.

Uh... that's... that's kind of it. I know there's a lot going on here, but either a) anything else I have to say would by spoilery or b) I have nothing to say.

Tallies!

TOUGA DROWNED: 1
Everybody Got Cancer (and shit): 1
And Then Touga was a Chick: 5

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

Chapters 14 or 15 and 15 or 16 posted.

Yeah, it's time-skip time. Also time for me to try and fix some of the stuff that happened between Chapter 11 and this. And probably time for me to stop using chapter numbers, since I get less and less clear on what those really are.

I'll probably post more later, maybe even add some chapter notes, but right now a) I've got to go, and b) I really don't have much to say.

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

This story is not, in fact, dead. I was just being lazy and fickle. Also my computer was dead, and now I have a new one, so I have posted the next... 7 chapter-things, only one of which is not really goddamn short. Maybe I will go back through the pile and give them proper names and do chapter notes, but as it stands... not so much. It's pretty late, given that I have to get up at 5:30 tomorrow morning.

Edit: the new chapters are now view-able, and they start here. Please note that I'm not even bothering to say when there are time gaps, so... maximum nonsense, go! Also to estimate how much time is being skipped. And the super creative chapter titles.

Last edited by Kita-Ysabell (08-08-2013 12:13:53 AM)

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

Oh my word, I have so many chapter notes to do. I will do them! Also maybe I should come up with actual titles for a bunch of the chapters, so that I don't have to deal with the lack of a real progression.

Also, I switched "Romance" to "Hurt/Comfort," 'cause... yeah, it kinda is. Mind you, it's still not fluff, and it's working with a very contentious pairing, so by no means should anyone expect any crying on any shoulders or moments of un-fraught revelations or any vulnerability that isn't paired with someone trying to rip someone else's throat out. Unless Kanae is involved. And "Drama" remains my personal shorthand for "I'm trying to be literary here, dammit! Why can't ff.net recognize that?"

Playlist is... you know what, screw the playlist. It's there, if anyone wants to know more about it, they can ask. But this story isn't really meant to be a multimedia experience.

Chapter Notes: (which will now be given by proper title, rather than nonsensical chapter numbers)

No Promises:

Yes, they magically got into the car, okay? No, seriously, there are missing chapters.

Touga is turning into rather a pyromaniac, isn't he? emot-rofl

RE: "Of course": my Japanese is only slightly better than my German, (as gained by watching opera, fyi: I know how to say "The swan! The swan!" and not much else.) but this is one of those rare cases where I know what a character would say in Japanese, but I'm still struggling to figure it out in English. But since I'm generally substituting actual good writing for "no, it's supposed to read like a flawed translation!" I guess this is perfectly in keeping.

Fourteen:

The age references something that was referenced in other parts, one that's here (but Juri might be off on her math) and one that's missing, since it goes to Flying-Off-The-Handle-ville a bit.

Fugue:

Also known as "In Which I Continue My Love Affair With Words Starting With 'F'".

No, I don't know if this is realistic at all, my treatment of the subject is taken partly from The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, though I know the nature of the trauma is very, very different.

Traced in Memory:

Watch me sit on this here fence! Fence-sit, Kita, fence-sit!

For the record, I'm not saying that Touga isn't a victim of sexual abuse, or that his upbringing was anything other than pretty goddamn terrible. But I maintain that within the range of possible interpretations exists a continuity in which Akio was the first (and hopefully the last) to take advantage of him, and that his adoptive parents were buying not a toy, but an heir, which they proceeded to emotionally neglect the shit out of. And this fic isn't going to collapse the range of possibilities any, not if I can help it.

But yeah, this is the first of the childhood flashbacks. Aren't they adorable?

In the Courtyard:

You know how difficult it is to make all these chapter titles and have them not be incredibly stupid? Really hard.

And Saionji's landlady is kind of adorable. She totally ships it, but she doesn't really have the slightest clue what's really going on.

A Stranger Calls, Reprise:

Yes, I'm using musical terms in chapter titles, even though that's totally Miki's thing, and Saionji is (in my head at least) about as musical as a codfish. Sue me. The title shouldn't be taken as the final word as to who is calling, mind you. It may or may not be misleading.

Touga's answer to all problems? "Have sex with it." That's not pathologic at all. emot-rolleyes

Scratches:

I still don't know what to call it. Maybe it never gets a name, or Touga gives it a name and never tells Saionji, and Saionji always thinks of it as "the cat".

That said, it's a kitty!

An Indecent Proposal:

Yeah, given the chapter title, this should be way more exciting than it is. But no, Kanae just shows up again. Are we done with her? Heck no, but to be honest, I haven't written that part, much less posted it.

The First Disappearance:

Fuuuuuuuuck.

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

So this is now 63 pages in the digital document, (albeit in a format that's designed for ease of editing, not compactness) and almost none of that is posted. Why? Because it's time for an edit party! Touga needs to smoke more, Saionji needs to obsess over details more, Anthy needs to fuck with everyone more, I need to refrain from fail-tastic writing more, the list goes on.

But! I have taken a significant step in that direction by printing the whole thing out (damn it's long) and will focus editing in my spare time, rather than writing more scenes that need to be edited. There's a lot of scenes that I want to post, but... some of them are way towards the end. I am going to post out of order, but first, I'm going to edit.

Yasha · Back to Top

I'm afraid I won't be able to catch up on this until next week or the week after, but I'm definitely looking forward to reading it!

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

Hey, it's great to know that someone's reading, or planning on reading this, and I'm not just shouting into a vacuum!

Besides, that gives me a goal to un-shit-ify the posted chapters (and eliminate 99% of the annoying typos?) before you have a chance to read them! 'Cause I, for one, am not a fan of playing "spot the editing" in a piece I've already read, especially if it's the type of editing I think I tend to do, with tiny textual changes that are hugely significant to, like, plot and character development and themes and the like.

Yasha · Back to Top

Of course I'm reading them! As I have time, that is. I won't have any of that until Monday, and if you're not quite done with whatever adjustments, let me know and I'll hold off reading them emot-keke

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

How's about I let you know when I do finish adjusting things. Which will probably also include posting some more chapters about kitties and whatnot.

Two miscellaneous updaty things:

1. Apparently, wikipedia is not a good enough source for my Fanfic Opus, and thus, I have resorted to checking out some actual books about Shinto. And reading them.

And... it wasn't that long after Plato wrote Socrates Should Totally Have Used a Venn Diagram (time has not, in my opinion, been particularly kind to "Five Dialogues") that Motoori Norinaga and Fujitani Mitsue were having nuanced debates about the literal versus interpretive reading of a text, while bringing up issues that are totally fucking relevant to modern, everyday life.

And yet the arguments in favor of Japanese Native Studies get pushed into the corner of the ghetto of Eastern Philosophy, studied only by otakus and new age hippies.

2. This story now totally has a theme song: Little Talks by Of Monsters and Men. Thank you, Of Monsters and Men, your blending of introspective meditations on troubled relationships and Lovecraftian horror is very fitting for my uses.

Note that "bodies" does not imply "alive". Also, every time I hear a moderately applicable song that refers to a house, in my head, the house is Ohtori. And lastly, I totally mis-heard "Some days, I can't even/trust myself" as "dress myself." Either serves equally well.

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

WOOOOO!!!!

This round of edits, complete with excessive smoking and shitty baseball metaphors (they are so shitty) is now complete! Though not entered into the computer, or posted, or anything like that.

Stay tuned for further updates. Should be coming up pretty quick.

Yasha · Back to Top

Hurrah!

....now I just have to actually find time to read.

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

Nope, nope. Not posted yet. Still working on it. Just done in pen-and-paper.

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

Aright! Updates are actually updated. It might take a while to go live, when it does, there'll be 26 chapters instead of 20. Chapter notes will happen... later. Also more posts, 'cause that's what it was really for, not just miscellaneous stuff about cat toys and smoking.

Oh, and all my "Warning: this shit will not make sense" bits are gone. Hmmm... I wonder if I'll put them back up...

Edit: OMG ff.net has added a pairing system that... it's laughably incompetent at describing the relationship clusterfuck that's going on here. The main relationship focus... hmm... it's got...

Well, here's a really shitty map. It shouldn't be spoilery, really. You should know this by now. Note the lack of details.

Yeah, ff.net can't handle that.

Last edited by Kita-Ysabell (10-18-2013 12:05:46 PM)

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

Okay, up to 30 chapter-things. Definitely time to get some chapter notes up. I've made a lot of edits, some major, some minor, but I'll only address like, new chapters and chapters with new names and/or a ton of new content.

An Evening of High Fashion

It's just Catching Up, with a new title and a few new details.

LIMI feu is a Japanese... fashion house? avante-garde fashion line? Oh god, I need to know how this shit is organized. TOO MUCH RESEARCH. Anyways, the lead(?) designer is Yohji Yamamoto's daughter. You can really see her father's influence in her collections, but she's also taken it in a looser, less tailored direction.

The Right Bad Idea

Well, this is high on the list to get some serious editing, but seeing as I wrote the whole back half of it on the back side of the editing hard-copy... yeah, that's gonna happen next round.

Anyways, the transition from Ohtori to the car: now with about 50% less teleporting! The other 50% is totally intentional. This is, given the general setting and themes, (do I need to spell out why? I feel like I shouldn't have to spell out why) a pretty low-magic take on SKU, but it's not no-magic.

A Revelation

The ultimate solution to all possible problems? "Have sex with it." That's not pathologic at all. emot-rolleyes

And isn't Saionji absolutely terrible at pillow talk?

Blowing Smoke

Used to be "A Stranger Calls, Reprise," but then I added a bunch of stuff about Touga smoking, so I thought I might as well change the title.

Touga would totally smoke. It's stress avoidance, pleasure seeking, and suicide ideation all rolled into one horrible little bundle of addiction and lung cancer. Hooray!

(Not to mention that French anti-smoking ad that equated smoking with sexual abuse. Yeah... )

Let Me Tell You a Secret

I've had this floating around for a while, I just couldn't quite figure out where to put it, but... I think it needs to be here. More establishing what Saionji's daily routine looks like! And having him obsess over details, particularly those of Touga's appearance.

I don't know if it's just in my head, or whether it really comes across in the text, but I feel like every time Saionji looks at Touga he wants to jump his bones. Dude, seriously. Take the porn glasses off. Or maybe I'm the one who needs to take the porn glasses off. Hmm...

A Cat's Ammusement

I feel like there need to be less puns in the titles. And other places. Do there need to be less puns?

So yeah, after refreshing myself on Baudelaire's lovers, I went with Jeanne. It's more indicative of how he relates to this particular cat. Well, really, it's overstating any sort of aspect of his relation to it that isn't like, "It's a kitty! Hi kitty! Does the kitty want a hug? I shall give it a hug!" because Touga is a damn idiot around cats.

The Princess in the Walled Garden

Kanae, guys. FUCKING KANAE.

Contamination

A friend of mine was kind enough to read through the revision hard-copy (and even kinder to act excited about it) and most of the feedback I got from her was "the non-third-person sections are confusing, and not in a good way." I guess... I am an asshole writer and I kind of like to make my readers work. There is a metaphor here. Go fetch. Doing so will make it clear who is speaking.

Also: awww, kids!

Referral

Yelling at the cat and reading gossip articles about idol singers: clearly, Saionji's reaction to stress is to act like a bumbling idiot that we can all laugh at.

And yes, there is THERAPY. This is the real world, there are therapists, and while they are not magical and will not fix all of your problems instantly, it is still a good idea to go see them.

Session 1

Which was supposed to be Session #1, but apparently ff.net is afraid of hash tags. Whatever.

Shitty baseball metaphors ahoy!

And Touga. In therapy. It's like, it should be a sitcom or something.

The Prince is Dead

Please note that, prior to this chapter, Saionji and Touga got an invisible visit from invisible lawyers. It totally happened. It is very important to the plot, and Nanami's role in said plot.

And describing fashion is hard.

Volition

Ugh, there's a plot/thematic thread that got dropped about... about the time they leave Ohtori. And it kinda gets picked up again here. But there needs to be some additional development in the interim, because otherwise this is FUCKING CREEPY. In not-a-good-or-intentional way. But it's also possible to not notice it, so... yeah.

And Touga has massive issues with the concept of doctor-patient privilege. Doesn't help that the lawyers showed up. 'Cause they totally did.

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

I should make a New Year's resolution to post a chapter, like, once a week or something. It's not like I don't have time to work on this, or raw material to clean up and post. Welp... yeah. About that.

So of course I wait until I want to post three chapters. There's a whole segment here I'm trying to get through, it's basically the end of Imaginary Book 2 of this and into Imaginary Book 3. Or Acts, whatever.

Chapter Notes:

So You Still Do That

I adore the intro of Confession. Yes, I read it for a class, but give me credit, it's not the only book I've read.

Tilting at Windmills

So this is a chapter. That happened.

I really have nothing to say about it.

A Word of Warning

Shooooort chaaaapters. Well, it's the beginning of the part that I really, really want to post. It's just the least interesting part.

Last edited by Kita-Ysabell (01-23-2014 01:03:19 AM)

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

Non-existent New Year's resolution is coming along fine, as I've posted a new chapter. It's, well, it's longer than the last one. That's something, isn't it?

Chapter notes!

The Unimaginable Future:

Well, I don't hate the title. That's actually a very good title, by my standards.

And this chapter... because clearly, what this pile of angst and trauma needed was aimless twenty-something ennui. Clearly, that's the one thing that was missing. Ugh.

On the other hand, I think this is actually an issue that long-term, real-world continuation fics kind of have to deal with. The world we live in, the real world, is not exciting. It does not change because you yell hard enough. It cannot be solved with climactic sword battles. So what, in that context, does "revolution" really mean? Is it merely an aspiration that is doomed to frustration?

And Touga, in my opinion, would feel it keenly.

Dreaded Claymore · Back to Top

As you probably know, I feel like a twelve-year-old who somehow was invited to his mother's book club. This is the same way I felt all through high school and college. But the difference is that, in school, I wanted to throw the book at the teacher's face, and scream at the whole class that I didn't know what they were talking about, and stomp out and never come back. Now, somehow, I like thinking about these characters and what they're doing and the way it's written, and I want to read more. Thank you for writing. etc-love

Last edited by Dreaded Claymore (01-29-2014 09:28:57 PM)

Kita-Ysabell · Back to Top

Fake New Year's resolution? What fake New Year's resolution! Yeah, no update last week. I was doing A Horrible Thing, working title: Insubordination. Different fandom.

But I'm back! With the help of a ass-kicking edit, for this section and this section only. Which… I probably proceeded to ignore, but what the hell. TRAINING WHEELS BAD. CONTINUED SECRET ASSOCIATION WITH LANCE ARMSTRONG GOOD.

Chapter notes:

The Snow Princess

This chapter is titled after my mis-remembering of the un-executed rules of magic in a fairy tale that I've never actually read. I'm going to say it was by Hans Christian Anderson, but that's probably wrong, too. So… it's probably actually a reference to a webcomic, which probably can't be found anymore, and was probably read by less than fifty people. Yeah, go references!

In other news, psychic powers for everyone!

Yes, this section is kind of how everyone's on the same page without realizing it. Touga warns Saionji about Kanae, and then Kanae earns that warning. Touga bitches to his therapist about how he misses the illusion of easy answers and an exciting life yet to come that he left at Ohtori, and well.

Also: NO GODDAMNIT I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE TO KNOW WHAT THE TEA SHOP LOOKS LIKE. I'm kind of intentionally avoiding describing any scene that isn't in Ohtori itself, and maybe I can pretend that's for plot reasons? And not, you know, because I'm horribly lazy. I read books about Shinto for this. Books, dammit, as in more than one! For a fanfic! I DO NOT WANT TO TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY ENOUGH TO DO ANY MORE RESEARCH. And I have no idea what stuff looks like in modern-day Japan. Well, unless I just, like, steal scenery from other anime. That… that would be interesting. Not necessarily a good idea, but interesting.

#1 | Back to Top03-25-2013 03:45:05 AM

On Unions Civil and Otherwise- Post-series fanfic, unfinished, linked

#2 | Back to Top03-25-2013 03:40:50 PM

Re: On Unions Civil and Otherwise- Post-series fanfic, unfinished, linked

#3 | Back to Top03-25-2013 03:46:44 PM

Re: On Unions Civil and Otherwise- Post-series fanfic, unfinished, linked

#4 | Back to Top03-25-2013 07:40:19 PM

Re: On Unions Civil and Otherwise- Post-series fanfic, unfinished, linked

gorgeousshutin wrote:

#5 | Back to Top03-25-2013 08:42:09 PM

Re: On Unions Civil and Otherwise- Post-series fanfic, unfinished, linked

#6 | Back to Top03-25-2013 09:33:55 PM

Re: On Unions Civil and Otherwise- Post-series fanfic, unfinished, linked

Yasha wrote:

Yasha wrote:

Yasha wrote:

Yasha wrote:

#7 | Back to Top03-25-2013 09:58:40 PM

Re: On Unions Civil and Otherwise- Post-series fanfic, unfinished, linked

#8 | Back to Top03-25-2013 11:40:00 PM

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#9 | Back to Top04-05-2013 03:41:52 PM

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#10 | Back to Top08-07-2013 11:39:50 PM

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#11 | Back to Top08-19-2013 03:57:00 PM

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#12 | Back to Top09-10-2013 02:10:08 PM

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#13 | Back to Top09-10-2013 04:19:11 PM

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#14 | Back to Top09-11-2013 02:40:59 PM

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#15 | Back to Top09-13-2013 02:18:41 AM

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#16 | Back to Top09-16-2013 01:28:54 PM

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#17 | Back to Top10-16-2013 11:11:19 PM

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#18 | Back to Top10-17-2013 03:05:00 AM

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#19 | Back to Top10-17-2013 12:46:34 PM

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#20 | Back to Top10-18-2013 01:34:16 AM

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#21 | Back to Top10-18-2013 01:30:36 PM

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#22 | Back to Top01-22-2014 10:16:24 PM

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#23 | Back to Top01-29-2014 08:22:41 PM

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#24 | Back to Top01-29-2014 09:27:28 PM

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#25 | Back to Top02-12-2014 11:44:40 PM

Re: On Unions Civil and Otherwise- Post-series fanfic, unfinished, linked

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