This is a post-series fanfiction, so warnings for spoilers, and some femslash. I'm curious as to what the reaction would be from this forum as most of this was inspired by analyses (plural needed?) that I've found over the past few months here on IRG, so a big thanks to everyone who writes/contributes to them Without further blathering on my part, let the story commence!

Chapter One: Nevermore


Looking at the gates of Ohtori from the outside had once filled Anthy with an indescribable elation, but it was a whole other matter to be walking through them again.
As she stood fiddling nervously with the skirt of her uniform (the one she swore never to wear again) she couldn’t help but have doubts. Was this really the only way? Perhaps she’d overlooked some option (even though she knew she’d tried everything). There was nothing more for it, she decided, steeling herself by glancing down at the wrinkled and worn photograph resting atop her enrollment papers.
“Tenjou Anthy” was written on the bottom of the page in neat calligraphy, along with the signatures of parents who didn’t exist and the telephone number of the café she’d been filling out the forms in. She found it vaguely odd for someone her age to be going to high school, but it had always been odd-as had she.
This time, she was just a student; Ohtori was essentially just a school, and if there were dueling games going on she’d have no part in them.
That was a lie, of course-she’d probably have run-ins with the duelists, and most assuredly her brother-but playing his game was different when she played it on her terms.
If Utena was here, she would find her-there was nothing that could stop her, not after all this time.
But she’d begun to wonder what that even meant; she was not as sure as she was the day she laid her glasses on the desk in quiet revolution. How could she be? She’d gained many things from Utena that day, but blind optimism was not one of them.
It was in the spirit of her prince’s bravery that she stepped forward, joining the throng of other students heading into the illusion.
--
Akio noticed how the planetarium projector lurched slightly, its metal body moaning in protest. He looked up from his place on the white couch with concern evident on his face, standing up to rap his knuckles against the side lightly, with no reaction apparent from the machine.
He murmured something incomprehensible and went to sit down at his desk, moving a vase of violet roses aside to shuffle through his papers, looking for something in particular.
    “Tenjou Anthy”
He looked up at the white roses that now rested in the vase, an indignant scowl crossing his normally pleasant features. Akio picked up a rose, and began plucking its petals absentmindedly as he turned to face the projector.
    “Well, dearest, isn’t it this interesting?”
    The machine simply rattled, the creaking of metal sounding almost like a ghost.
--
    Anthy wondered off-handedly if telling her brother of her arrival had been a good idea, but she relished the opportunity to demonstrate her newfound freedom to him. She turned from the chairman’s tower back to the arbitrary tour of the campus she was taking-hardly for nostalgia, just the hope that she might find Utena playing sports or walking to classes perhaps.
    There was the possibility that Utena was not here as a student, but she had all the time in the world to search. The magic energy of this closed world radiated off of every wall, fence, and statue, time slowing down and dragging all the inhabitants with it. Anthy hadn’t noticed it until she lived without its constant hum for five years, and it was taking some getting used to.
    She’d realized early on that magic no longer worked in the outside world, and it had been quite a deterrent as she had hoped to find Utena that way. But still, she’d persisted in her search out of stubbornness and a desire to stay away from Ohtori for as long as she lived.
    Then she’d had the dream, the one she could barely remember now, but all she knew was that Utena was there, that she needed to come back. She’d berated herself for not coming to that conclusion sooner-it should have been obvious, Ohtori was where it had all begun, so of course it would end there.
    End? What does that mean, anyway?
--
    The group made its way to the basketball courts, and Anthy stood rapt at attention. This was the first place in the school she would look-a little flutter of hope sprang up in her heart as she rounded the corner.
    The courts were full of boys in their sports jerseys, running about madly as schoolgirls stood by, whispering, blushing, and giggling. Anthy scanned the crowd, looking for pink hair among the brown and black.
    Her heart stopped when she found it.
    She could only see her back, and her hair was cut boyishly short, but there was no mistaking her. Not when she’d spent so long going over her photos and memories and of the times they’d spent together, she knew it had to be Utena.
    And yet, something wasn’t right. She hadn’t the patience to dwell on it as she made her way excitedly over to where Utena was.
    “Utena-sama!” she called out softly, but she didn’t turn around; she kept on walking, to Anthy’s confusion. Anthy decided she hadn’t heard her and continued following her, until they were in the all-too familiar hall that led to the rose garden.
    “Utena-sama?” she tried again, and the person who turned to face her was only Utena to the untrained eye; to Anthy, it was like looking at a complete stranger.
    “I’m sorry, but who are you?” she asked politely, yet curtly.
    The girl looked unnervingly like Utena, only she had shorter hair and wore an eye patch. It might almost have been comical, only it somehow served to make her quite intimidating. There was something about her gaze that Anthy couldn’t place, but whoever she was she wasn’t Utena.
    “I apologize, I…mistook you for someone else.” In her disappointment she reverted to her old timidity, her desire to run away and cry safely hidden from her face. The stranger grunted amiably.
    “You must be new, then. I’m Tsuchiyo Kagami-and you are?” she extended a hand, and Anthy shook it; it felt cold and dead.
    “Hime-Tenjou, Tenjou Anthy.” She stated, wanting nothing more than to get away from this person.
    “Tsuchiyo-sama, the council is asking for you,” a familiar voice called out.
    Kaoru Kozue hadn’t changed a bit since Anthy had seen her last- of course, her hair was longer, and she looked slightly older, but the air about her remained unchanged. It reminded her of her brother, in a way that made her somewhat nauseous.
    “Hmm. See you around then, Tenjou-san.” Kagami waved briskly, put an arm around Kozue’s shoulders and the two of them headed down the hallway as Anthy felt increasingly like being sick.
    It took her years of training as the rose bride to conceal her emotions for the rest of the orientation-she was on the brink of despair, feeling worse than she had all the times she’d almost given up when she was searching for Utena; to find her, but still not have her was more than she could bear.
Did Utena change? Or was it just some sick joke played on her by her brother?
They were questions she didn’t want answer. All she could manage was to get to her blissfully empty dorm room and collapse on the bed, her tears flowing more freely than they ever had.
--
    “Two can play at this game, little mouse,” Akio chuckled to himself, sipping his wine gracefully. The flute burst into shards, splattering wine over his shirt like fresh blood, the pieces of glass crashing to the floor with an eerie chime. He gave an exasperated sigh.
    “Is that really all you could do, my dear? These parlor tricks of yours are growing old.”
    With a sweep of his hand the shards were gone and his shirt was clean, and he turned to the projector; the wide white couch burst open with thorny vines and roses of all hues sprouted forth from the upholstery. 
    “Have I not made myself clear?” Akio snapped at the mechanism, undoing the illusion once more.
    “I suppose it was you who brought her here,” Akio regained his composure and continued in a silky, dangerous voice, “But do you really think that will help? Do you honestly believe I can’t beat her?”
    The room was dead silent, but he smiled as if he’d received an amusing answer.
    “Of course you do; neither of you would be where you are now if you didn’t.”
--
    Anthy stood in the dueling arena, the night sky lit by the Castle of Eternity; her bridal gown hung heavier on her than she remembered, and she nearly tripped over the skirts as she walked about aimlessly. She tossed her glasses to the side, feeling them snap under her feet and not really caring-there was something more important to be found here.
    The planetarium projector sat in the middle of the arena, as it had during the duel of Revolution, and the desks were lined up next to the convertibles that stuck out from the ground at odd angles. They were all just reminders of the past that Anthy tried to ignore, focusing on her the certainty of her unknown goal.
    Utena stood near the projector, and Anthy noticed her heart sword (or was it Dios’ sword?) protruding from the side of the machine; Utena reached for it, but it burned her hand as she tried to grab the hilt. She kept trying to grab it, but the same thing happened, until her hand was raw from the abuse.
    Anthy ran to her, grabbing her shoulders and pulling her away, which took some effort on her part, but she clung to her, burying her face between Utena’s shoulders and pulling her closer.
    “Himemiya…” Utena murmured, as if waking up, and she lay her hand on top of Anthy’s, wound around her waist.
    She turned and gave Anthy a desperate look, and she saw that one of her eyes was missing.
--
    Anthy woke drenched in sweat with tears dried on her face. Having a dream about Utena wasn’t a rare occurrence, but something about that dream felt similar to the one that had led her back to Ohtori-the same gut wrenching vividness, the feeling of urgency, and horror…Most of her dreams were just memories of the days they had together, echoes of the past, but these dreams were a message.
    All she had to do was uncover what that message meant.

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