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A famous musical beetle band: an ant, a grasshopper, a mantis, and a fly.
What is a guinea pig?
Japanese men in most Animes.
What's the circumference of Uranus?
Because kids between the ages of three and eighteen are too dumb to know not to lean in too close so they don't poke an eye.
Why can't we all just get along?
Because nobody can decide whether Coke is better than Pepsi.
Why can't you eat just one Lay's potato chip?
Because they're saving that for the Pringles.
Why don't pigs fly?
Trick question, the rooster came first.
What is the scariest words the the English language?
Bankrupt, tax as in 'tax report,' and insurance.
If you read doujin hentai, does that make you a peeping tom?
I could only hope.
Who loves orange soda?
Grapes and strawberries.
Why do my tarantula and scorpion fight all the time?
Because a while is not a specific time frame.
Why my piggie?
Because they are for science. SCIENCE!!
Why doesn't a decent spellcasting system exist in real life?
Because when the universe was created, all the emo didn't get used immediately.
How come we've nearly exhausted our supply of oil, but not our supply of stupid?
Because knowledge is power, and power corrupts, and apparently the people you're talking about aren't at least Lawful Evil.
Why do they say "if the shoe fits, wear it"? What if you don't like the style or brand?